Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
I just headbutted my cat because he was trying to eat my bacon.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
Randomize
