That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
I had to explain to the waiter that I'm not the DD because I can't drive, but as the Designated 'Make Sure No One Gets Roofied Or Hit By A Car On The Walk Home'-er, I should still get the free drinks.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
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