Just got booted from water taxi for showing my balls to a security guard.
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
Are you in a cab?
I'm close- can you order me a bowl of vodka?
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
...then she kept trying to make balloon animals with my flacid penis. I'm never drinking whisky with you again.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
Randomize
