things that need to be invented #43: vodka that also acts as birth control.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
Randomize
