Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
I deserve this hangover.
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
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