Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
i knew it was time to leave when he woke me up only wearing pooh bear oven mitts and holding a plate of thank you pancakes
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
Randomize
