this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
You've changed since you got that strap on
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
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