I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
When i was leaving for work this morning, i realized the neighbor was passed out drunk, with no pants, and a half eaten whopper on my lawn. Knowing that hey..we have all been there before.. i decided to give him a pillow and a blanket rather than wake him up.
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
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