So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
Randomize
