It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
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