Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
I am spending my child support on dildos
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
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