I think a homeless person took a bath in my mouth while I was sleeping :(
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
i totally just wrapped her wedding gift in tin foil. These are the skills 2 bachelor's degrees have given me.
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Randomize
