found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
