11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
You said you couldn't use your body anymore so you made me push the buttons on your phone while you made alien sound effects
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
Randomize
