at church Sunday morning I dropped an M&M down my dress and it landed in my bra. I fished it out and ate it. A lot of people saw me.
Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
Randomize
