Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
Randomize
