can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
I'm at about main and main street
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
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