My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
