do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
He called me from prison intake to wish me luck on my job interview. Somehow that's the most romantic thing that's ever happened to me.
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
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