i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
well, you know. whores of a feather.
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Randomize
