I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
My brother just woke up to see me on te couch dipping hamburger buns into pizza sauce. I'm beginning to question the life choices that led to this moment.
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
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