u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize
