I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
I recorded his orgasm, set it as his ringtone, and called him while they were singing happy birthday to his mom. Yeah, revenge is sweet.
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
Randomize
