I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
Randomize
