her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
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