So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
and I'm going to name my autobiography "blow jobs with enthusiasm are the best"
I'm naming my autobiography "Reasons Not to Date Girls From Texas."
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
I don't know. I just have an affinity for nudity when I'm drunk.
How the hell am I supposed to tell that to a group of eight year olds?! It was three in the afternoon for fucks sake!
i think im in europe. pls send help
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
to be fair i didnt know she wanted to sleep with me
WHY THE FUCK ELSE WOULD SHE DRAG A STRAIGT MAN INTO A VICTORIA'S SECRET CHANGEROOM GODDAMMIT
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