I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
Randomize
