just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
He asked to "fluff my boner.."
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
He's a Shit stain on my heart
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
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