there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
Just high enough for therapy.
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
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