She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Randomize
