We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
I don't save the phone numbers of guys I don't like. That way it's a surprise when a random number texts me and tells me I have great tits.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
Randomize
