Why is my head in the toilet this morning but there is vomit behind the toilet
I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
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