I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
Randomize
