Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
just woke up face down in my kitchen covered in cheetos. my mom just stepped over me to get to the coffee maker. hello summer
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
It's shark week go big or go home
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
Randomize
