he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
Fuuuuuck dude, he’s got #Excel in his Facebook bio; I’m screaming
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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