i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
You disappeared for an hour and showed back up with handfuls of bratwursts and yelled at my girlfriend that if she didn't eat them, that the nazis win
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
Randomize
