So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
Oh my god. My pre-date bowl for nerves tuned into "I'm too high for this date" he kept talking about trucks and I couldn't stop making racial slurs.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
Randomize