therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
I'm at the perfect height to walk up to the corner of my mom's stove and rest my balls on it. Just thought you'd like to know they're warm.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
Tried to land my foot on his shoulder and kicked him in the face. Then I fell into a homeless man's bike and posed with a buffalo head. How was your night?
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
Randomize