none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
We ran out of wine so we are trying the absinthe you brought over from Spain like 3 years ago. Please call me at noon tomorrow. If we die, its your fault
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
I have fence marks all over my body
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
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