redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
Randomize
