Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
I heard some girl say 'yeah he mustve been so drunk he kept mumbling and repeating himself'
And I thought
Fuck I do that shit every weekend
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
Actions speak louder than pants.
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
Randomize
