just come out here and I will go home with you...
Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
Thanks to a poorly written tweet a whole bunch of people thought I died last night.
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
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