have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
My friend's 9-year-old son just informed me that for a cop station, you can't use a shotgun; you have to use a machine gun. Thank you, Grand Theft Auto, for single-handedly corrupting our youth.
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
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