you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
Just saw him riding in a basket on the front of a bike trying to feed the other guy beer. He screamed 'PARTY BIKE BITCHES!' at me as they rode past.
I lied. He's hitting on a drag queen now. Should I rescue him or take pictures?
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
Randomize
