Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
Randomize
