Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
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