just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
I had my own version of the Hangover last night. I woke up to a disassembled Christmas tree, shit on the futon, and a hamster in the bathroom with a necklace on that said "Feed Me Bitch." I don't own a hamster. I don't know what I drank last night, but I want to do it again.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
To my ex and my favorite mistake: I totally enjoyed hearing you have erectile disfunction via baby monitor!
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
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