Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.
while you were getting the key to the dorm from the lobby i was giving a drunk monolog to the security camera about my life
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
Randomize
