He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
I want a bottle of whiskey to be dropped at my doorstep like a stork drops babies when they are delivered to their parents.
God what have you done to be that much in need of alcohol.
Me WANTS my preciousssssssssss
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
Randomize
