I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
as soon as I walked into work this morning, my boss called me out on my hangover, patted me on the back and said I'm getting time an a half for even showing up. Did I really look that bad this morning?
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
Randomize
