I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
So I purposely left a bunch of metal in my pockets so that the smokin hot TSA officer would give me a pat down. Airport security just got fun
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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