can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
You ruined the universe
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
